Once again, Trump displayed for us his favored decision making style—long on gut, short on information—when he boldly stated he didn’t need to prepare for his meeting with Kim Jong Un. Chas Danner in New York Magazine (June 9) quoted Trump: “I think within the first minute I’ll know,” Trump said, further explaining that it would be “just my touch, my feel — that’s what I do.” The article went on to say, “Trump’s apparent strategy—to essentially wing a historic peace summit over nuclear weapons with one of the world’s least trustworthy authoritarian regimes like it’s a real estate deal or reality television reveal —is unlikely to play out well.”
Time will tell how Trump’s so-called deal-making prowess will work out. Actually, time has already told us. Once again, Trump has failed. According to several reports, Kim Jong Un is proceeding with his nuclear ambitions as usual. Who’s the deal maker now?
With all the punditry amassed about our dear leader since Inauguration Day, has anyone ever bothered to grill Trump in detail about his gut, his microbiome, if you will? I think not.
I doubt Donald has ever heard of the word “microbiome” or if he has, he’s dismissed it as one of those “sciencey, fakey newsy, CNNy” kind of things.
The microbiome, a melange of bacteria, fungi, protozoa, virus and bacteriophages occupies the human body, both inside and out. Many of these are helpful to our functioning; others, not so much.
The health of our gastrointestinal system is so vital to our overall well being that researchers are investigating the means by which some “microbe-related intestinal disorders are associated with anxiety, depression and other mental symptoms.” (http://learn.genetics.utah.edu/)
Just as cars need high-quality motor oil, gasoline and other fluids to keep them in tip-top shape, our guts need a high quality diet of fruits, vegetables, nuts, seeds and protein. Which leads us to the question — how healthy is Trump’s gut? As has been reported by many, he gorges on a diet of Big Macs, French fries, milkshakes and Oreo cookies which he washes down with 12 Diet Cokes per day. Twelve! And we wonder why he’s so impulsive and angry? That’s his microbiome screaming for relief.
Reading about Trump’s terrible diet made me curious about other world leaders — what do they eat? I focused on our three important allies: Angela Merkel, Justin Trudeau and Theresa May. My internet sleuthing turned up the following: Justin is apparently fond of Asian food; Theresa likes Hungarian baked chicken with tarragon and Dijon mustard; and Angela loves letcho, a vegetable stew; shashlik, a spicy kebab; as well as potato soup, trout and plum cake. All of these dishes would appear to be microbiome-friendly, which might help to explain their thoughtful, steady governance. No guts on display here, just careful analysis and consideration of all the facts prior to making decisions.
Who’d a thunk that bacteria, fungi, protozoa, virus and bacteriophages would hold the key to world peace, with our fate in their hands, or paws, or whatever it is they have.
Seems inevitable that we’re headed for a WWE Smackdown between the Axis of Evil Big Macs/fries/milkshakes/Oreo cookies, swimming in 12 Diet Cokes per day vs. the Allies of Health with their Asian food, chicken and letcho, luxuriating in red wine.
For the sake of all humanity, may the best microbiome win!
Rosie Sorenson is a humor writer in the San Francisco Bay Area. You can contact her at: RosieSorenson29@yahoo.com.
From The Progressive Populist, August 1, 2018
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