Statement by Donald J. Trump, 45th President of the United States of America

Channeled by BARRY FRIEDMAN

A lot of people, A LOT, have begged me to report about the STATE of our union and how I’m doing since the greatest theft transpired of all time in our nation, the 2016 PRESIDENTIAL ELECTION that was totally rigged and caused your great PRESIDENT, me, to leave office, even though I won a great, tremendous and total landslide. I am strong and lost weight even though I didn’t have to. A lot of people say I look young and great and I’m hearing from people across the nation in really terrific numbers that haven’t been seen since I engineered the greatest VICTORY when I won in 2016, before anyone knew what hit them, or they probably would have stolen that, too, and we’d have CROOKED Hil and Bill as president and most likely a Civil War, even though I love peace tremendously and would hate the destruction, especially on children, who I love.

Like many of you know, I was winning this time and then all of sudden I wasn’t. Huh? Well, spineless Republicans like the guy in Georgia, Raffensperger, who should be fired or impeached, is why. In one case, outside of Atlanta County, I heard they found ballots, nobody knows how many but it was in the hundreds of thousands, close of a million, about to be burned out back of Democratic headquarters, but we got there just in time to save them, even though Raffensperger won’t count them because he knows they were for me and it will totally change the election there and in the rest of the country and make himself look bad and corrupt, which he is. Lib media won’t report this story, what do you expect, and my attorney general Barr, who was as bad as Sessions, did nothing.

And notice how nobody said anything to JFK when he chose his brother for the job, even after they both slept with Marilyn … no, just I get criticized — like when they accused me of making fun of the crippled TIMES guy when I didn’t.

It’s TOTALLY a lie I had anything to do with what happened in January at the so-called “Insurrection” after I was NOT given an opportunity to make my case before CONGRESS — other PRESIDENTS have — and people went over to the building to protest. M. Pence, who was a total loser before I made him Vice President, really let me down, and others told me to pick him. This rigged commission is a SHAM that wants to give AMERICA back to Obama and Sleepy Joe, even though they ruined the place with their spending and other things, like Solyndra and immigrants, and I made it better with tax cuts, a beautiful WALL, and moving the capital of Israel to Jerusalem.

It was a bag job. Speaking of bag jobs, Nasty Nancy looks old and crazed and that haircut she got during the time she told others to stay inside didn’t do much for her but she’s not my type anyway. I told Kevin McCarthy, the GOP speaker, “No way, Jose,” about participating in her witch-hunt, after she said he couldn’t put Patriots on the panel, like the people who support me, like Jordan. (Wear a coat, Jim, people will take you more seriously. I’m very serious). Liz Chaney, who is really a terrible woman and NANCY’S new best friend who’s on the panel, is in BIG trouble in Montana and probably won’t win reelection. I support her opponent, Anthony Bouchard, who believes in the things WE do — like the end of abortion and socialism, more prayer, and a strong national presence in the world, like the Palestinians and Europe. Tony promised to stop the Dems criminal enterprise, and that’s what it is, folks, plus find out who killed Ashli Babbitt, a hero in the Airforce and loved her country like me, a Patriot, before being brutally slain by Pelosi or Schumer’s bodyguards. I don’t know for sure they killed her, but I was told that by more than one person so it makes you wonder.

I fully expect to be reinstalled as YOUR president this month, August, and we’re all working very hard for that to happen, both in the COURTS and elsewhere, like the streets but peacefully. There, I said it, even though I understand why so many AMERICANS are upset I was ripped from office when things were going so well and want revenge. And now the Delta VARIANT —it’s called a variant because it varies from the original. A lot of people don’t know that — is ruining Sleepy Joe’s presidency, but he’s ruining America. I never got the credit I deserved for the Trump Vaccine, a lot of people are calling it, and it would have got me the Nobel in medicine, a lot of great doctors have told me, if the Nobel people weren’t in the pocket of Libs. Fauci, who was never nice to me, undercut me all the time and he still has to answer for why he allowed the Chinese to release COVID — the CHINA FLU, I call it — and do experiments on bats that got out into the air. It’s like the virus just walked out the building and Fauci held the door. He’s really a terrible guy.

I look forward to returning to the PRESIDENT and doing to it what you want and I enjoy doing. Help me against this rigged election by contributing to our cause. It’s your future and last chance for America and US. Have a good summer. Your welcome.

Barry Friedman is a satirist in Tulsa, Okla., and a lot of people are saying he is doing some very good work there. He is author of at least four books, including “Road Comic,” “Funny You Should Mention It,” “Four Days and a Year Later” and “The Joke Was On Me: A Comedian’s Memoir.” See barrys friedman.com.

From The Progressive Populist, September 1, 2021

Populist.com