Table Manners Make the Candidate

By SAM URETSKY

Job 31:35: “Oh … that my adversary had written a book.” Now all politicians write books, but the modern version of the quote might be “oh that my opponent would eat lunch.”

One of the most divisive subjects in modern electoral politics is the obligatory ethnic lunch which shows that the candidate is not only a down-to-earth person but has ties to the local community. Unfortunately for political hopefuls, there are no guides to proper political table manners.

In 2014, New York’s Mayor, Bill de Blasio ordered a smoked-mozzarella-and-sausage pizza. He was eating at Goodfellas, a Staten Island pizzeria of respectable age and redoubtable reputation. The next day the New York Times reported, “A Fork? De Blasio’s Way of Eating Pizza Is Mocked.”

The observation brought back memories of 2011, when Donald Trump and Sarah Palin went into a Times Square pizza joint and ate pizza with a knife and a fork. The knife and fork are appropriate for a Chicago style, deep dish pizza, but New York’s thin crust is traditionally eaten bare handed, folded lengthwise.

Mayor de Blasio explained his behavior, saying, “In my ancestral homeland, it’s more typical to eat with a fork and knife.” The explanation didn’t appease the critics. John Kasich, Governor of Ohio and former candidate for the Republican nomination for president, who also ate pizza with a knife and fork, did hardly better by saying, “it was very hot.”

There are other examples of politicians making mistakes during the local food ritual. Mitt Romney managed to achieve culinary embarrassment without eating anything. According to CBS News, he greeted a southern crowd with a faux drawl and said “Morning, y’all, I got started this morning right with a biscuit and some cheesy grits.” Aside from the false regional accent, CBS reports that while, in Southern states, grits may include cheese, the term “cheesy grits” is a Northern expression.

In 2004, John Kerry, while running for president, stopped in Philadelphia to sample one of the city’s famous cheese steaks. Unfortunately, he ordered his sandwich with Swiss cheese instead of Cheese Whiz. The episode went viral, and the food critic of the Philadelphia Inquirer wrote, “Swiss cheese, as any local knows, is not an option.

The Massachusetts Democrat may as well have asked for cave-aged Appenzeller. But even when Kerry was given a proper cheesesteak hoagie, he made matters worse by delicately nibbling at it as if it were tea toast ...” Of course the Food Network disputed the absolute requirement for Cheese Whiz and wrote, “The big cheese steak debate, ongoing between rival restaurants Pat’s and Geno’s, is whether the steak should be topped with Provolone or American cheese, or canned Cheese Whiz.“ When Bobby Flay made cheese steak on this show, Throwdown, he made his with a Provolone sauce, the texture of Cheese Whiz and the taste of Provolone. Bobby Flay lost.

President Obama was subjected to some scorn early in his first term, although it may have been purely politics. When President Obama and Vice President Biden took a trip to Ray’s Hell Burger in Arlington, Va., the president ordered with the concern for detail that marked his presidency: “I’m going to have just your basic cheddar cheeseburger, medium well, I just want mustard, no ketchup. If you’ve got like a spicy mustard or something like that, or a Dijon mustard, something like that.”

Laura Ingraham, conservative talk show host, said, “I don’t even like the way the man orders a hamburger. What kind of man orders a cheeseburger without ketchup but Dijon mustard?”

The most significant food debate this year was in New York, where actress Cynthia Nixon, best known for playing Miranda on Sex and the City, while challenging Andrew Cuomo for the Democratic nomination for governor, ordered a lox and bagel, or more specifically a cinnamon-raisin bagel with lox, red onions, capers, tomato and cream cheese.

We have come a long way when we can accept the red onions, capers and tomato with the traditional lox and bagel, but the cinnamon raisin bagel was explosive. It inspired a number of reviews, including one from Bon Appetit in which they served the Nixon sandwich to members of their editorial staff, many of whom liked the contrast of sweet and salty.

Ms. Nixon, who had been part of the left-wing insurgency, lost the nomination, but many of her colleagues won and defeated established politicians, most notably Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, a 28-year-old Latina running her first campaign, ousted 10-term incumbent Rep. Joe Crowley in New York’s 14th Congressional District. Other establishment figures, at the state level, were also defeated.

Adam Gopnik of The New Yorker made a critical point – the ethnic foods in these anecdotes are from the immigration waves of the past, and “The actual ethnic food of New York now is not deli-bought but food-cart-delivered, and is far more likely to be Lebanese or Israeli or Filipino or Korean than Ashkenazi Jewish or Italian.” This is a city that welcomes new cultures and new foods, and eats all the better for it.

Sam Uretsky is a writer and pharmacist living in New York. Email sdu01@outlook.com.

From The Progressive Populist, October 15, 2018

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