J.D. Vance is a Psycho Killer, or Something

By JOHN YOUNG

“We all go a little mad sometimes. Haven’t you?” nnI’ve thought about that line from Alfred Hitchcock’s “Psycho” ever since I saw J.D. Vance in drag.

The “little mad” line comes from cross-dressing psycho killer Norman Bates, who, like Vance, is a little bit odd. How odd, we only find out in the shower scene.

Understand: Just because Vance donned women’s clothing as a collegian and eyeliner as Donald Trump’s running mate shouldn’t disqualify him from public office.

(Although we should bar him from library storytime.)

Wore a woman’s dress and wig? That makes him a groomer! And maybe a psycho killer.

Whatever the case, I wouldn’t advise that you Google the image in question. It will haunt your dreams.

The fact is, you don’t need that imagery in your head. Vance’s words are enough to scare you — women in particular.

Not only does he want the government to make women’s reproductive decisions, he wants them to get down to popping out babies. Like right now.

If you can’t or won’t do that, ladies, apparently it’s your duty to die.

Put aside Vance’s “sad cat ladies” description of single women. Put aside his assertion that women’s sole “post-menopausal” role is to Granny-up for the kiddos.

Those in the “childless left” who aren’t contributing in said fashion, he said, “have no physical commitment to the future of the country.”

You know, Tim Walz is right. This guy is creepy.

On the subject of not Googling images, don’t do it with John Carpenter’s creepy horror flick “Village of the Damned.” You will see multiples of a young J.D. Vance. I said don’t do it.

That movie is based on a John Wyndham novel, but it could be a Vance work considering his estimation of women’s worth.

In it, all the inhabitants of an English village are induced into a slumber. All the women wake up pregnant.

All their children, rows and rows, have penlights for eyes, a stare eerily like J.D. Vance’s.

Who is this man? The more you hear from him, the more you wonder if he’s comedy or horror.

Consider his endorsing a book co-written by bizarre right-wing conspiracist Jack Posobiec. It calls progressives “unhumans” who “kill the people who have more” than they do.

In other words, Bernie Sanders has a double life, and a machete.

If J.D. Vance can endorse such assertions, we can assert things about him, and wonder whom he has killed and at what motel.

This delivers me to suspicions anyone would have about a man who’s changed his name more than once, as Vance has.

So, too, with one who so dramatically changed his assessment of a dangerous political figure – Donald Trump – whom he called an “idiot” and compared to Hitler.

Back to Vance’s statement that “miserable, childless cat women” aren’t vested in humankind’s future: How vested is he in the role of mothers when he calls universal child care “class war against normal people”?

Bigger picture: How devoted to the future is an individual who blasts climate action legislation so that he can rake in mega-bucks from Big Energy?

It’s just another flip-flop from the identity-fluid senator from Ohio. Not so long ago, Vance expressed real concern about climate change. That was before a Republican political career beckoned, along with inducements from the Koch money machine.

I’m beginning to think that J.D. Vance isn’t one person but a composite of characters from more than one movie.

Whatever the case, never find yourself between this man and a shower curtain.

John Young is a longtime newspaperman who now lives in Fort Collins, Colo. Email jyoungcolumn@gmail.com. See johnyoungcolumn.com.

From The Progressive Populist, September 15, 2024

Populist.com