Cheryl Hines of “Curb Your Enthusiasm” fame and wife of notoriously demented Robert F. Kennedy, Jr., has rushed to file for divorce.
When reporter Nora O’Donnell asked why, Cheryl teared up and said, “There have been three people in our marriage from the beginning, and I can’t take it anymore. At first, Bobby assured me that he had the worm under control, that whenever the worm bad-mouthed me, he could put the worm in its place. But, the worm has only gotten stronger and more aggressive in his personal attacks. He’s the one who pushed Bobby into the devil’s bargain with Trump.”
“Does this worm have a name?” asked Ms. O’Donnell.
“Clyde.”
“Just what does this ‘Clyde’ want?”
“All along, Clyde has wanted Bobby to himself, and told him that I was just an interloper and had no business taking up Bobby’s time or space in his brain.
“I figured I’d better file for divorce now before Trump and his ilk put their radical conservative dictums into place, including one that makes no-fault divorce illegal. Can you believe the cojones on these guys?
“It seems that many of the new law’s supporters are young men who have been left in the dust by their women, and they are still mad about it. They want to keep their wives yoked to their singular version of connubial bliss, no matter how unhappy the women are.
“They want to re-establish the old grounds of infidelity and cruelty, of course, but disqualify the harboring of a brain worm as a valid condition for divorce. Under their proposed rules, a spouse simply cannot get a divorce from someone housing a brain worm.
“So, I’m giving a heads up to all women everywhere, especially the ones whose husbands have a worm in their brain—which are probably more numerous than anyone cares to admit—GET OUT NOW while the getting’s good!
Rosie Sorenson is a humor writer in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her column is satire and, like Fox “News,” cannot be believed as fact. Email: RosieSorenson29@yahoo.com. See RosieSorenson.com
From The Progressive Populist, October 1, 2024
Blog | Current Issue | Back Issues | Essays | Links
About the Progressive Populist | How to Subscribe | How to Contact Us