The day after William Barr’s testimony about the Mueller Report, one of Trump’s staffers secretly recorded a conversation between Trump and Mitch McConnell. A heavily redacted copy was smuggled out to an anonymous reporter by a source unknown.
“I’m so burned by this stupid Mueller report and the damn Dems,” said a red-faced Trump, stomping around the oval office, “that I’m thinking of [][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] and then [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“But Mr. President,’ Mitch replied, “You’d never get away with [][][][][][][][][][][][][][] [[][][]][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“Come on, Mitch, don’t fail me now [][][][] .[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“But you can’t do that, Sir. What about our donors and [][][][][][][][][][][][]. “
“Don’t worry, Mitch. Barr will cover my ass no matter what I do, even if [][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]”
“Might I remind you your poll numbers are [][][][][][][][][][] ?.”
“Doesn’t matter. My base will [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] and then we’ll [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][[][][][] you’ll see. You worry too much.”
“I hope you’re right, but [][][][][][][][][][][][][][],” said Mitch. “I still think it’s too [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][].”
“You’re sounding like an old lady, Mitch. Bush did it, I don’t see why [][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][].”
“Have you looked at our budget, Iately,” asked Mitch, “At this rate, [][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] Social [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] Medicare [][][][][][][][][][][][][][] people won’t stand for [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][].”
“Ah, Mitch, the people will stand for what I tell them. [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] It’s the only thing that will [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“But, you don’t seem to understand the [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]. Could be millions.”
“Come on, Mitch, why do we have ail those [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] if we don’t [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“The point is not to [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][] And, besides, we can’t borrow [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][].”
“You’re such a girl, Mitch. Of course we can. I’m the President of the entire effing world.”
“‘No, you’re not. The United States, yes. The world, no. Our allies [][][][][][][][][][][][] [][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]
“What are they gonna do? I can’t be stopped and you know it. lf Mueller couldn’t stop me, nobody can.
It’s a great day for the Trump Presidency, Mitch.”
Rosie Sorenson is a humor writer in the San Francisco Bay Area. Email : RosieSorenson29@yahoo.com.
From The Progressive Populist, June 15, 2019
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